January 24, 2008
January 23, 2008
The Gospel According To John (Moses Browning)
John Moses Browning was perhaps the finest firearms designer, ever. His designs continue to work and to serve almost 100 years after they were created. There is an ongoing controversy about the reliability and safety of current 1911s vs. other "modern" pistols and I think this about sums the situation up.
As translated from the original ancient manuscripts by Fr. Frog.© copyright 2002 by John C. Schaefer
1 In the beginning was the 1911, and the 1911 was THE pistol, and it was good. And behold the Lord said, "Thou shalt not muck with my disciple John's design for it is good and it workith. For John made the 1911, and lo all of his weapons, from the designs which I, the Lord, gave him upon the mountain."
2 "And shouldst thou muck with it, and hang all manner of foul implements upon it, and profane its internal parts, thou shalt surely have malfunctions, and in the midst of battle thou shalt surely come to harm."
3 And as the ages passed men in their ignorance and arrogance didst forget the word of the Lord and began to profane the 1911. The tribe of the gamesman did place recoil spring guides and extended slide releases upon the 1911 and their metal smiths didst tighten the tolerances and alter parts to their liking, their clearness of mind being clouded by lust.
4 Their artisans did hang all manner of foul implements upon the 1911 and did so alter it that it became impractical to purchase. For lo, the artisans didst charge a great tax upon the purchasers of the 1911 so that the lowly field worker could not afford one. And the profaning of the internal parts didst render it unworkable when the dust of the land fell upon it.
5 And lo, they didst install adjustable sights, which are an abomination unto the Lord. For they doth break and lose their zero when thou dost need true aim. And those who have done so will be slain in great numbers by their enemies in the great battle. a
6 And it came to pass that the Lord didst see the abomination wrought by man and didst cause, as he had warned, fearful malfunctions to come upon the abominations and upon the artisans who thought they could do no wrong.
7 Seeing the malfunctions and the confusion of men, the lord of the underworld did see an opportunity to further ensnare man and didst bring forth pistols made of plastic, whose form was such that they looked and felt like a brick, yet the eyes of man being clouded, they were consumed by the plastic pistol and did buy vast quantities of them.
8 And being a deceitful spirit the lord of the underworld did make these plastic pistols unamenable to the artisans of earth and they were unable to muck much with the design, and lo these pistols did appear to function.
9 And the evil one also brought forth pistols in which the trigger didst both cock and fire them and which require a "dingus" to make them appear safe.
10 But man being stupid did not understand these new pistols and didst proceed to shoot themselves with the plastic pistol and with the trigger cocking pistols for lo their manual of arms required great intelligence which man had long since forsaken. Yet man continue to gloat over these new pistols blaming evil forces for the negligent discharges which they themselves had committed.
11 And when man had been totally ensnared with the plastic pistol, the lord of the underworld didst cause a plague of the terrible Ka-Boom to descend upon man and the plastic pistols delivered their retribution upon men. And there was a great wailing and gnashing of teeth in the land.
12 Then seeing that the eyes of man were slowly being opened and that man was truly sorrowful for his sinful misdeeds, the Lord did send his messengers in the form of artisans who did hear and obey the teachings of the prophet and who didst restore the profaned 1911s to their proper configuration, and lo, to the amazement of men they didst begin to work as the prophet had intended.
13 And the men of the land didst drive out the charlatans and profaners from the land, and there was joy and peace in the land, except for the evil sprits which tried occasionally to prey on the men and women of the land and who were sent to the place of eternal damnation b by the followers of John.
a Several old manuscripts add the following text. "And they [also rendered as "these men"] didst chamber it for cartridges who's calibers startith with numbers less than the Holy Number 4. And lo the Lord did cause great grief amongst these men when their enemies who were struck in battle with these lesser numbers didst not fall but did continue to cause great harm."
b or Hell
© copyright 2002 by John C. Schaefer
For the faithful, the "feast day" of St. John Moses Browning is January 23.
January 21, 2008
Posted by Svinrod at 6:45 PM
January 15, 2008
January 14, 2008
Posted by Svinrod at 3:34 PM
January 11, 2008
Before there was an Internet, an XBox or Wii, there was Dragons and Dungeons. The most sophisticated video games of the age were Pong and Asteroid. They fit into a console slightly smaller than a phone booth. D&D still used the 19th century technologies of pen, pencil, graph paper and dice (or die) and a little(or very little) imagination. There was always one player with an(imaginary) axe. Consequently, said axe was used as a weapon, a universal key/door opener, a means of dividing treasure etc...Brute force dont'cha know. More often than not, it was perhaps not the best answer. Sometimes though, it was precisely the right answer.
Nowadays, I find that I am often playing not Dungeons and Dragons, but it's 21st century equivalent. Lets call it Terrorists & Trolls. T&T. I like that. The terrorist part is right here on You Tube Smackdown. You can go to directly to the enemy castle and become an instant Troll. It is fun because they hate it, and frankly, how often do you get to be as obnoxious as you like all in the name of God and Country? Here, the imaginary axe is a hoot!
The Troll part of T&T is slightly different, but not much. I have only been using this medium for a short while, but it amazes me that some people would rather argue with an Internet Troll than hit them with an axe. Really! A Troll is a Troll. Hitting them with axes is what normal people should do. Have you ever tried debating with a Troll? Their most brilliant insights can be reduced to noises like "Uunnghh! or Gthaack!! Civilised people often prefer civilised discussion, but reasoning with a Troll is like playing Beethoven to an omelet. Strange behavior with predictable results. The omelet will always get cold before the end of the first movement. Breakfast is ruined and Beethoven gets nothing out of the deal either.
So what have we learned today(apart from that Svin forgot to take his Meds)? Trolls and Terrorists are alike in that they both need to be hit with an axe. Or a Tomahawk. Now go forth and rack up some hit points. We are in a target rich environment. All we need to do is hone our bad manners.
Svinrod the Swordless has left the Building!
January 10, 2008
The best thing about Andrea's "Express" version of the Anti-Jihad is that you don't have to read any of the stuff that I occasionally post here. It is not a Blog. It is more like a Target Acquisition Radar. The fastest and easiest way to go to You Tube directly and start helping to take down these sites.
It Really Works! We have taken down so many individual videos and closed so many accounts that I have lost track. All due to the indefatigable Andrea and her army of siblings and assorted co-conspirators.
So Please-Click on the Link at the top and go Whack a few Moles. Her site deserves all the support you can give to it. Is this the most effective way to fight the jihadist propaganda machine? I can only quote the great Teddy Roosevelt regarding another war in a distant land. "Do what you can, where you are, with what you have!" Sage advice for any time really. NOW GO DO IT!!!